Saturday, May 28, 2016

Beyond Satire

Real life too often today puts satire to shame. I shall begin with “Liberal Line Dancing.”

Some years ago in Baltimore I took a stroll through a street festival near the Inner Harbor. One event I encountered was something I hadn’t witnessed in person before: line dancing. I had become immersed in the subject of dancing while researching the Sparrowhawk series, set in 18th century Britain and America. I learned that it was only in the early 19th century that individualized dance between couples was introduced and became popular, preceded by the form of highly formalized and controlled modes such as the minuet and its variants, in which the couples barely touched each other.

Until then, from Medieval times to the present, dance was largely a collective pastime. Line dancing seems to be a hybrid of square dancing, which itself has roots in contra or country dancing preceding even Shakespeare’s time, but without participants even having to touch anyone. I was obliged to square dance in high school, and had to clasp the sweaty palms of dozens of others of either gender I didn’t know and didn’t want to know. Personal choice in such affairs of one’s partners was ruled out.

In liberal political, synchronized line dancing, all the players, in unison, wobble, wiggle, gesticulate, kick, turn about, swivel their hips, pantomime, roll their shoulders, and place their hands over their ears, mouths, and ears. The moves are commanded by a dance master, accompanied by a fiddler playing a monotonous tune over and over again, or perhaps with a Karaoke player. The most popular liberal line dances are called “The Shuffle,” “The Dodge,” “Duck and Grovel,” “The Wet Dog,” “The Double Side Step,” “Shake ‘n Bake,” “The Burqa Bop,” “The Muslim Moon,” “The Prayer Rug Stomp,” “The Shadada Shimmy,” “The Cover Your Butt,” “The Twirly,” and “The Hillary Rodham.”

Of all the religious, ethnic, or political groups that make up this country, only Muslims have no dance tradition. Islam does not permit dancing, except for joyous, spontaneous jumping up and down every time Americans or Westerners are killed. Muslims only believe in making babies, and that can’t be comfortably done on the dance floor.

On a more serious note, one of the biggest allies of Muslim immigration (and also of illegals from South of the Border) are the myriad "fair housing laws." The federal government has issued them, and so has every state and local municipality. "Fair housing laws" prohibit discrimination by race, creed, etc. by property owners or landlords.  I left this amended comment on a Sultan Knish column, “Only Islam Can Save Us From Islam.”

Employing this law, the feds and Christian charities that bring in Muslims by the boat full can dump Muslims "immigrants" in places as urban as New Jersey and as unlikely as Montana.

The irony of a "fair housing" law is similar to that of a state or city banning smoking in "public" spaces like restaurants, private clubs, and so on. The irony is that if you set the terms of whom one can associate with in these conditions, you own the facility, not the owner. Non-smokers wanted their "safe places" in which to dine. So bars and restaurants lose business and eventually go out of it. I've seen it happen over and over again where I live.

And if you try to prohibit Muslims from even applying for living space in this country in a private venue, you no longer own your apartment or residential block; the government does and the only beneficiaries are the "discriminated" applicants. You will be called to court and fined up the wazoo. And probably even told to pay compensation to Muslims for trying to keep them out of your hair, out of your daughter's shorts, and off your neck in terms of knives. You’ve hurt their feelings. Freedom of association is a dead letter. If you can't choose your tenants, then you are but a steward of "public" property, and the master sets the rules.

Related to this subject is the new, utterly bizarre anti-discrimination rule in New York City, which prohibits private businesses from barring LGBT and other anti-sex groups from employment and perhaps even housing, and probably even forces bakeries to bake cakes or taking wedding photographs of people you really don’t want to see or touch. Daniel Greenfield discusses this rule in a Front Page article, “New York is Enforcing Gender Identities It Can't Define.”

Individuals living in New York City can choose from a minimum of 31 different gender identities, many of which allow them to fluctuate between some version or a combination of male or female identities.

Businesses that don’t respect and accommodate an individual’s chosen gender identity risk incurring six-figure fines under rules implemented by the city’s Commission on Human Rights.

The list of protected gender identities is available online and includes options such as “gender bender,” “two spirit,” “third sex,” “androgynous,” “gender gifted,” and “pangender.” A city official  confirmed to The Daily Caller that all of the listed identities are protected by the city’s anti-discrimination laws, but said that the list was not exhaustive.

“Exhaustive” is too delimiting a term. Say, rather, the list can be expanded ad infinitum. You have only to use your imagination.


Don’t blink, or you’ll miss page two of all the alternative genders. Greenfield remarks: “About 70 percent of this list means the same basic thing. Non-op is also redundant because the official doctrine now is that a man can claim to be a woman without undergoing any surgery.”

Reading the list, I was reminded of a Star Trek: The Next Generation episode in which Dr. Beverly Crusher, the Enterprise’s medical officer, was having an affair with a humanoid alien who was actually just the host of a parasite that was the real intelligence. The host suddenly dies and a new one is sent for. The actual alien, put in stasis until the new one arrives, resembled nothing less than a bovine liver.

The new host arrives. It’s a woman.

Dr. Crusher rejects the prospect of having an affair with her. When asked why by the host (speaking unseen for the transplanted bovine liver), she responds that the human race “hasn’t progressed that far yet.” Or words to that effect. Crusher would be amazed by the number of “new” genders that don’t even include the livers of ungulates. Perhaps she would prefer necking with the bladder of a yak. There are more genders on the New York City Commission’s list than aliens in the crew of the Enterprise, more aliens in gender than in a Star Wars cantina sipping Galactic Slurpees.

Of course, readers will all remember the arduous affection of an Argentinean (or Peruvian) who, with great ceremony, married a tree. Determined to go one better, several San Diego students married the ocean at the behest of Santa Monica philosophy professor Amber Katherine. Truth Revolt’s Trey Sanchez carried the headline grabbing story, “This Week in Progressive Lunacy: 'EcoSexual' Professor Marries Students to the Ocean.

Campus Reform talked with Amber Katherine, a philosophy professor, to explain the event and what it means. She said it was to bring about an "ecocentric passion and even lust" for the Earth. Funding for this environmental "marriage" came courtesy of SMC's Public Policy Institute, as well as other campus organizations.

Rings were handed out and students were led with the pronouncement, "With this ring, I bestow upon the sea the treasures of my mind heart and hands—as well as my body and soul. With the power vested in us, we now pronounce you ‘married to the sea.'"

Once "wed," the class was instructed to "make love with the water" by dipping toes in the sea "or any part of your body that you want."

Splish, splash! Looking out, of course, when engaged in connubial bliss, for sharks, Portuguese-men-war, and moray eels. When you marry the ocean, it isn’t promising you a rose garden. Still, the ocean is what the New York City rules might define as “gender fluid.”

Meryl Dickson, of The Walking Dead, in between sips of his whiskey, asks:
“Never mind socialism. Do they know anything about  differential calculus?”

Let us not forget the landlocked Wiccans, who held a formal ceremony in the name of Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders. Craig Bannister of MRCTV reported on May 1st, in “Sanders Camp Holds Friday 13th ‘Ritual for Bernie’ for Wiccans, Druids and Heathens”:

A Bernie Sanders event in Portland, Oregon is inviting wiccans, Druids, heathens and atheists to a “Ritual for Bernie” to “raise the energy” of his presidential campaign:

“Clearly you're feeling the Bern. Maybe you're a Wiccan? Pagan? Goddess worshiper? Heathen? Druid? Spiritual but not religious? Secular Jew? Spiritually open minded? Unaffiliated? Atheist who likes ritual? Other? And you would like to engage with a community of like minded individuals to raise the energy of the Bernie Sanders vibration to a higher frequency and ultimately change the world for our children, grandchildren, and all future generations. I hear you!”

The event is aptly set for Friday 13th in a place called Woodstock Park – and, spelling errors aside, appears to be legitimate, since it claims to be “Paid for by Bernie 2016” and lists both a “Contribute” button and Sanders’ official campaign mailing address.

With such hope and change offered by the Wiccans, all Sanders needs now to clinch the Democratic nomination is a rain dance by Elizabeth Warren, that war bonnet-wearing faux Cherokee Indian from Massachusetts.

Let us not leave out the ethereal perorations and scribblings of university professors. They are in large part responsible for the lunacy in our culture. On May 16th, Tom Ciccotta ran a Breitbart column, “Madness Behind the Method: The Writings of the Craziest SJWs in Academia.  Here are some samples of papers written by the cream of academe:

From North Carolina State: “Sexy warriors: the politics and pleasures of submission to the state”
Jesse Paul Crane-Seeber, who received a Ph.D in International Relations at North Carolina State University, wrote his dissertation on why “war is sexy in contemporary US culture.” The paper, which was titled “Sexy warriors: the politics and pleasures of submission to the state” allowed Crane-Seeber to become an Assistant Professor in Public and International Affairs at NC State.

From Palgrave Macmillan, publishers: “Pornographic Animals”
“Pornographic Animals” is a text written by R. Malamud to explore the intersection of visual sociology and human sexuality. In this groundbreaking work, published by Palgrave Macmillan, Malamud writes about human-Animal intercourse and why humans are sexually attracted to animals.

From the University of California-Santa Barbara: “Smart Cookies: The Gendered Spaces of Labor, Citizenship, and Nationalism in the Girl Scout Cookie Sale”
This 2013 PhD dissertation points out the danger of selling of girl scout cookies and argues that the practice “prepares girls for their roles as American women in a neoliberal and capitalist society.” According to the author, the girl scout cookie selling tradition is responsible for aiding in unconscious female support of “market capitalism, neoliberalism, and American nationalism.” The dissertation argues that the annual girl scout cookie sale manipulates young girls into blindly accepting American society’s expected role for women.

From the University of Alberta: “The Moving Body and Social Change”
Pirkko Markula of the University of Alberta argues that one of the best ways to fight capitalism is through personal exercise routines. According to Markula, through her “experiences as a fitness instructor”, the work “explore[s] if it is possible to practice movement differently beyond the biopolitics of neo-liberalism.”

Had enough? There’s much more in Ciccotti’s article, if you need a good laugh.

But do not laugh too hard or too long. These people exist in the real world. They want you to come along with them and share their Kook Aid and power bars. Progressivism is a long, long progression to insanity.

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